Droplets glistened off his skin in the rays of Californian sunlight as Erwin climbed out of the pool, the weight of the water practically melting off him as he emerged.

Levi couldn’t help but stare at his husband from above his sunglasses, a smile forming on his lips.

Golden boy. In every sense of the word.

Since they’d gotten married a couple of months ago, life was bliss. Erwin was a stock broker, rich as filth. And Levi was happy to be his little house husband, especially with maids and servants around to do the dirty work for him.

Erwin made his way over to the lawn chair Levi sat in, leaning down to kiss him sweetly. A giddy feeling flowed through Levi’s chest as he strained his neck to capture Erwin’s lips.

Everything was so perfect. They had a huge house with a pool and all the latest amenities… but more importantly, they were so in love. Levi had never felt this way for anyone before. It felt like he’d found his soulmate—someone he could spend forever with. And that’s what he hoped. He hoped he and Erwin would be together forever.

“You’re not going for a dip?” Erwin asked. He grabbed the towel from his own lounge chair and started to dry off.

“Maybe,” Levi shrugged, picking up his hand fan and cooling himself off with it.

Erwin already had a mischievous look on his face. He set down his towel and scooped up Levi in his arms, causing him to drop his fan on the ground and gasp in surprise as he clung to his semi-wet husband.

“Erwin!” Levi giggled, playfully hitting his chest as the man carried him towards the pool steps. “No! Let me down!”

“I wanna get you wet,” Erwin grinned, waggling his eyebrows.

“Oh you,” Levi scolded as he whacked Erwin’s chest once more.

He carried Levi down the steps, and Levi squeaked as his legs and ass were submerged first. It wasn’t cold, but it was still a difference in temperature on his skin. Erwin continued into the water until they were both fully immersed.

“It’s nice, isn’t it?” Erwin asked, still hugging Levi close to his body.

Levi held Erwin around the neck, smiling up at him and nodding, “Yes. It’s lovely.”

Erwin beamed. His smile was so intoxicating. Levi could get drunk off it—such a handsome, charming smile.

The two had met at a bootleg party about a year ago now. Erwin had swept Levi off his feet on the dance floor, swinging and swaying all night long as the alcohol burned in their bellies. Since then, they’d been inseparable. It was only an added bonus that Erwin was rich and handsome. When Erwin had brought Levi back to his home, Levi was in shock to see how huge and ornate it was.

The two were in what their friends liked to called a ‘forever honeymoon’ phase. It never seemed to end. They were completely blissful and stupid in love with one another. Kisses, gifts, love-making. It was truly an infinite love.

“Erwin?”

“…”

“Erwin…?”

“…”

“Erwin!” Levi tried a third time to get his husband’s attention, a frown painting his face.

Erwin looked up from his newspaper briefly before his eyes went back to scanning the columns, “Mm?”

“I… I was just wondering if you’d like to go for a walk this morning,” Levi asked nervously, twisting his cotton napkin in his lap.

“Mm,” Erwin responded, turning the page before he looked back up. “Oh. What?”

“I was wondering if you’d like to go for a walk this morning,” Levi repeated, biting his lip.

Erwin stared at him for a brief moment before going back to reading the newspaper, “Oh… no, no. I have a meeting. I’ll be going into the office today.”

“But… But it’s a Saturday,” Levi protested, though he regretted it as soon as it left his mouth.

Erwin set his newspaper down with a loud sigh, “Levi, I don’t have time for this.”

“Sorry…” Levi mumbled, taking a sip of his tea.

Erwin huffed a little before folding up his newspaper and getting up. He walked over to Levi and patted him on the shoulder, “I’ll be back later.”

With that, he walked out of the dining room without even a kiss goodbye. Levi sat back in his chair, looking over the half-uneaten breakfast the cook had made for them. Erwin had barely touched his, and Levi had only eaten the toast.

Levi got up from the table and went about his day as usual. He read a few magazines and went for a morning swim. He lay on his back in the water and tried to think of how he could get Erwin’s attention again.

Nothing could last forever. Their forever began to crumble with each day that passed over the next five years. Erwin became more involved in his business, and Levi remained loyal, but he could see Erwin’s love for him shrinking as the years went on.

Levi went back inside and took a long bath, scrubbing his skin and prepping himself so that he was perfect for when Erwin came home. Erwin still slept with him—there was no problem there, but the love had gone from their bedroom and was replaced with just general fucking.

Levi didn’t mind that so much, but… he missed making love. He missed Erwin’s sweet kisses along his neck, the gentle ‘I love you’s he whispered in his ear. He didn’t know what to do to bring that back, but he tried every time to present himself as best he could for his husband.

He finished his bath and got dressed, going to the telephone room to call up Erwin. Surely he’d be done with his meeting by now. And he already missed his husband dearly, even though it had only been a few hours since his parting.

Levi dialed the operator, who put him through to Erwin’s office. Levi was giddy to hear Erwin’s voice, and using the telephone also put him in that kind of mood. It was new technology, after all, and Levi and Erwin had the best available.

It rang a few times before Erwin picked up, and just hearing his voice made Levi’s heart jump from happiness. Erwin was like Levi’s lifeline—he couldn’t live without hearing his voice and seeing his beautiful face. He only wished Erwin felt the same way about him.

“Hello, Smith’s office?”

“Erwin,” Levi breathed, a small smile tugging at his lips.

“Levi?”

“Erwin, I—”

“Why are you calling?” Erwin asked. “Is everything alright?”

Levi almost never called Erwin at work. He knew Erwin was a busy man, and didn’t want to bother him. But Levi figured for a Saturday, Erwin might like a surprise call from his husband.

“Everything’s fine,” Levi murmured. “I just missed you… that’s all.”

He hoped that confessing this romantic feeling might stir something in Erwin—might rewaken that love they used to have not so long ago.

“Levi,” Erwin sighed, sounding frustrated. “You can’t just call me at work like this. I’m very busy.”

Levi’s heart sunk into his stomach, “O-Oh… I just thought… since it’s a Saturday…”

“I have a lot of work to do,” Erwin muttered, sounding uninterested. “I’ll be home later.”

“O-Okay,” Levi smiled hopefully. Erwin would be home later! Maybe then he could spend time with him… “What time will you be home?”

“Later,” Erwin replied. “I have to go.”

Levi heard some giggling from a woman in the background before the line went dead. He felt very nauseous all of a sudden. Who was that? And why had Erwin been so short with him? Levi supposed Erwin had been short with him a lot lately, but this felt particularly awful. He hung up the phone with shaky hands.

“He’s… He’s busy…” Levi repeated quietly. “He has a lot of work to do.”

He stood up slowly and walked back to the bedroom, opening the top drawer. I can’t keep doing this… he thought. I can’t keep doing this. Every movement felt like he was being weighed down by all his insecurities.

“He’s busy…” Levi whispered, lining up the powder on the dresser with a razor. “He’s just busy.”

He snorted a line through a dollar bill and tried to breathe through his tears. The drugs spiraled up his sinuses and into his brain, creating an instant high. He sighed and sat on the edge of the bed, running fingers through his hair as an energetic feeling rushed through his body.

Levi soon got up and went to the kitchen, grabbing some alcohol from the cart and starting to drink. He knew he had bad habits, but he used them to cope with this strenuous relationship he had with his husband.

His mind drew back to that phone call. Who had been giggling? Levi suspected it was Erwin’s secretary, Marie. She was always so flirtatious with Erwin, even when Levi was around. It was as though she didn’t care that Erwin was married.

Levi tried not to picture what the two of them did together in that office. He was almost certain Erwin was fooling around behind his back. How else could he explain the close relationship the two had?

He continued his binge of drinking and doing cocaine throughout the rest of the evening, denying dinner from the cook and dismissing the servants so that he could be alone. He sat sprawled across the sofa, looking at the grandfather clock on the other side of the room. It was one in the morning. Where is Erwin? He wondered. Surely he couldn’t still be working.

Levi was so bored. He spent countless days locked away in this house while Erwin went out and lived a life he could only dream of. Erwin used to take Levi with him more often, but lately that hadn’t been the case. Levi was a circus animal, trapped in a cage and only brought out to entertain guests and keep Erwin happy—to show the world that Erwin had a great home life, even if that wasn’t the case.

You’re so lucky, he remembered Erwin’s friends saying at their wedding. Levi didn’t think Erwin felt lucky anymore, and Levi himself didn’t feel lucky either. He felt used and abused—not that Erwin had ever hit him. But he felt like Erwin only ever brought him to fancy events to show him off, not because he actually loved Levi and cared about his well-being.

He heard the front door open and sat up quickly, excitement flowing through his chest. Erwin’s home! He thought enthusiastically, peering over the couch to see Erwin stumble into the hallway from the foyer. He appeared intoxicated as well—a problem they appeared to share.

Levi rose from the couch and rushed to see him, watching Erwin’s face turn to one of confusion and surprise when he saw Levi meet him in the hallway by the stairs.

“Levi?” Erwin frowned. “Why are you up?”

“I waited for you!” Levi clung to Erwin’s arm and smiled up at him sweetly. “Where were you, anyways?”

“Are you my keeper?” Erwin asked with an irritated huff, pulling his arm away. “I was out with the boys.”

The boys—Mike, Nile, and Hange. Levi knew they got up to a lot of trouble, but he decided it was best not to question Erwin further about what they’d been up to.

“Oh…” Levi muttered. “Well… let’s get you up to bed then, shall we?”

“I’m not an old man,” Erwin mumbled, starting to walk up the stairs ahead of Levi.

Levi felt like everything he said was wrong. He quickly followed Erwin up the stairs to their bedroom, shutting the door behind them. Erwin peeled clothes from sweaty skin, leaving them on the floor. It always bothered Levi when he did that, but he never spoke of it. It was better to remain silent, lest they get into a fight over something so menial.

Levi got into his pajamas and climbed into bed cautiously, ever on edge around Erwin especially when he was drunk like this. Erwin crawled into bed next to him, turning off the lights and curling up under the covers facing away from Levi.

“Goodnight Erwin,” Levi whispered into the darkness, reaching out to touch Erwin’s shoulder before retreating his hand. “I… I love you.”

Silence.

Levi awoke to something hard pressed against his ass. He gasped as he felt an arm slink around his middle.

Oh, he thought. I know what that is.

Erwin’s hard-on ground against his ass gently at first, becoming more insistent with each roll of his hips. Levi tried to hide his smile. He didn’t get much attention from Erwin outside of sex, so he was excited to finally receive this much-needed attentiveness from his husband.

“You awake, baby?” Erwin purred in his ear.

“Y-Yeah,” Levi whimpered, pushing his ass back against Erwin’s morning wood.

He could feel his own interest tenting in the front of his pajama pants. A large hand slid beneath the fabric and started groping one asscheek, earning a quiet moan from Levi’s mouth.

“You want that, don’t you?” Erwin murmured, breath tickling his skin.

Levi squirmed in some frustration, wanting more than just this simple touch. Erwin’s fingers soon found their way to his needy hole, rubbing at the stretched opening.

“Oh?” Erwin chuckled deeply, his voice vibrating through Levi’s core. “You got yourself all ready for my cock… good boy. Very good boy.”

Pride swelled in Levi’s chest. I am a good boy, he thought to himself, reveling in the praise. Erwin pulled his hand out, the warmth of his body leaving for only a moment while he retrieved the oil from their bedside table.

“Mmm,” Erwin hummed, his oil-slick fingers finding their way back to Levi’s hole. He dipped the tip of his finger in and out for a moment before pushing in further. Levi moaned, tilting his head back to rest on Erwin’s chest.

Levi’s stomach churned with pleasure as Erwin played with his hole. Two fingers now fucked him gently, swooping in and out and rubbing against those tight walls. Levi loved this feeling of being opened up for Erwin. He felt like a flower, blooming in the sunshine of spring. He was blooming for his husband, petals peeling open with each thrust of his fingers.

“Ohh—I—” Levi gasped as Erwin stroked his prostate, causing Levi to jolt in his arms. “Erwin…”

“What do you want, baby?” Erwin whispered, using his free hand to pull Levi’s pants down under the bubble of his ass. “You want my cock?”

Levi swallowed thickly, intoxicated and heady as he forced himself to nod through the fog of it all. But through this potent cloud of lust, Levi had one simple goal in mind: missionary.

They used to do missionary more often, staring into each other’s eyes lovingly. But Levi couldn’t remember the last time they’d done it that way, and he was craving the love-making they used to be so fond of.

“E-Erwin…?” Levi asked. “Can we do missionary?”

There was a hitch in Erwin’s breath, as though he hadn’t expected such a thing. Levi never asked for much, especially during sex. He usually just took what Erwin gave him, and enjoyed it for the most part.

“Sure,” Erwin breathed, sitting up and taking down his pants. “Lay on your back.”

Levi did as he was told, giddiness filling up his stomach and chest. He spread his legs and held them back, presenting his hole to Erwin. His husband avoided his gaze, stroking his cock a few times with the oil to slick himself up.

Erwin placed a hand on the bed next to Levi, using his other to guide himself in. Everything was so slick. Levi moaned as he was filled up, wanton and needy. He reached up to cling to Erwin’s biceps as the man hovered over him, face scrunched up with concentration as he pushed in further and further until he bottomed out.

Levi expected Erwin to look at him. To give him a glance, something. But Erwin was decidedly staring at a spot above Levi’s head as he began to thrust. Levi whimpered and keened loudly, ever a slut for Erwin’s cock. But he still longed for that sweet love from his husband. Why won’t he look at me?

“Erwin,” Levi groaned, lacing his fingers around the back of Erwin’s neck and bringing their foreheads together. Erwin would have to look at him now. But the blonde squeezed his eyes shut, breath huffing against Levi’s lips as he continued to roll his hips.

Look at me, Levi’s eyes begged. He needed Erwin’s blues pouring into his grays. He was so desperate for that loving look. But he didn’t want to interrupt this moment they were having. It was already so kind of Erwin to pay attention to him—he shouldn’t be greedy… but he couldn’t help himself.

“Fuck,” Erwin muttered, eyes still shut. His eyebrows were drawn up in focus, an indifferent look on his face.

What is going on inside that head of yours? Levi wondered. Who are you thinking of right now?

Erwin didn’t seem to be here with him. He was somewhere else. And Levi wasn’t sure he wanted to take Erwin away from that place. He looked so much more content there than here with Levi.

“Oh god,” Erwin sighed, fucking harder. His balls slapped harshly against Levi’s ass before he slowed to a stop, his eyes finally opening (though they still avoided Levi’s). “I can’t do this. This position just… I can’t finish. Turn over.”

Levi frowned as Erwin pulled out. He’d been enjoying it… well, except for the fact that Erwin wouldn’t look at him. It just felt so much more personal when they were facing one another. But… he would oblige. He turned onto his stomach, getting up onto his knees. Erwin slid back in, a groan leaving his mouth.

He gripped Levi’s hips and started thrusting erratically, letting out a content sigh, “Much better, baby. God…”

“E-Er—ah!” Levi gasped. “Ngh—hnn—”

“Shh,” Erwin hushed him, placing a hand on the back of his head and pressing his face into the sheets. “Hush, baby. Just take it like a good boy.”

Levi whimpered into the bedsheets, biting his lip to keep quiet. He knew Erwin didn’t like it when he was too loud. It probably messed with whatever fantasy was playing in his head.

“That’s right,” Erwin growled, pounding into him repeatedly as he chased his pleasure. “Fuckin’—shit… so good. Take it, baby. Take it. Fuck yeah.”

Levi clawed at the sheets, pushing back against Erwin’s hand. He was losing air fast, hoping that Erwin might finish soon so that he could come up for breath. His eyes were rolling back from the intense pleasure he felt.

“You fuckin’ slut,” Erwin slurred, delivering a harsh smack to Levi’s ass. “You like that? You fuckin’ like that, don’t you?”

Levi couldn’t even answer, smothered by the linen. His vision was going in and out now, losing oxygen. But Erwin was close, he could tell by the inconsistent thrusting, the way Erwin’s thighs quivered.

“Ohhh my god,” Erwin moaned as he buried himself in deep, cumming hard inside Levi’s ass. “Shit.”

He finally let go of Levi’s head, and Levi came up sputtering for air. He was close too, but he hadn’t finished yet. Erwin’s softening cock was still fucking him, and he was so full of cum that it was squishing around with each leftover thrust.

“E-Erwin,” Levi whimpered as his husband pulled out. “Erwin, I wanna cum. I’m so close.”

Erwin was still breathing heavily, one hand lingering on Levi’s hip. He was frowning, Levi could just sense it. Erwin’s frown could radiate around a room, and Levi had become so used to it by now that he just knew.

“Erwin?” Levi tried again, turning to lay on his back and give him a pleading look. “Please?”

Erwin had a conflicted look on his face, and Levi hated asking too much of him. But this didn’t seem like all that difficult of an ask. Levi had helped Erwin finish… shouldn’t Erwin reciprocate?

“I actually have to get going,” Erwin replied. “Sorry.”

“Going?” Levi wondered aloud. “Going where?”

“I’m having brunch with some of my investors,” Erwin climbed off the bed, leaving his husband hard and aching.

“Oh…” Levi mumbled, his ego a little bruised. Why didn’t Erwin want to touch him? He used to always make time for his husband… why had that all stopped?

Erwin started grabbing clothes to go shower, and as soon as he left the room, Levi let a few frustrated tears escape his eyes which he quickly wiped away. He looked down at his half-naked body, his cock already softening as he was no longer in the mood.

Is it my body? Levi wondered, fingers gracing over his soft thighs and slightly pudgy belly. He’d gained a tiny bit of weight since they’d married, but nothing was obscenely different. But maybe that’s it… Levi thought, his insecurities flaring up as his mind played tricks on him.

Levi changed out the sheets, trying to keep his mind occupied until Erwin emerged from the bathroom freshly showered. He smelled so nice… all Levi wanted to do was hug him and bury his face into Erwin’s chest like he used to. But Erwin would barely let Levi touch him these days…

“Erwin?” Levi whispered as Erwin approached the bedroom door to make his exit.

Erwin paused and turned around, glancing at Levi with an almost irritated look, as though Levi was just some sort of bothersome pest that wouldn’t leave him alone. And Levi felt that way… he felt as though he was just a nuisance to Erwin.

“Yes?”

But Levi wanted so desperately to speak the words: “What’s wrong? What did I do?” that they almost rolled off his tongue there and then. It was tearing at his insides, threatening to break through his chest.

But instead of asking what he’d done, he simply put on his sweetest smile and murmured, “Um… h-have a good time.”

“Thank you,” Erwin offered him a brief smile in return before leaving the bedroom.

He smiled at me… Levi thought, feeling a little pathetic and stupid for being so giddy over the upturn of Erwin’s lips. But once Erwin left, that empty hole in his chest from before only grew. He had no answers to his questions, no idea what he’d done to make Erwin like this. All he was certain of was that it was his fault. And he didn’t know how to fix it.

“Can I get a pastrami sandwich to go please?” Levi asked the deli worker, handing him some cash.

“Of course, sir.”

Levi waited for the extra sandwich to be made and packaged up. He’d had lunch at Ricci’s today, an Italian deli in the town near their house, and decided he wanted to surprise Erwin at work with a sandwich. He and Erwin used to come to Ricci’s quite often together, but it had been a while since those days, and Levi hoped perhaps giving Erwin a sandwich from the deli would rekindle some feelings within him.

After he’d obtained the pastrami sandwich, Erwin’s favorite, he took the paper bag and got back into the car, instructing the driver to go to Erwin’s office building. It was a mere five blocks from the deli, but it was quite hot out and Levi wouldn’t be caught dead sweating in the nice outfit he wore.

Levi pushed the door open to the building and headed to Erwin’s office, surprised that the receptionist Marie was not at her station. As he walked down the hall past the other offices, he heard shrill giggling from Erwin’s. Levi paused in his tracks before continuing on cautiously.

He got to the door and listened as Erwin laughed with someone who had a high-pitched giggle. Levi frowned, recognizing the laughter. Was… Was that Marie? What were they so amused by? Levi rose a shaky hand to knock. Whatever they were doing quickly came to a halt as the two went silent.

“Come in,” Erwin soon said, and Levi pushed the door open to see Marie sitting on Erwin’s desk, legs crossed and a suspicious smile on her face.

“Levi,” Erwin tilted his head in confusion, glancing briefly between Marie and Levi. “What are you doing here?”

“I… I brought you some lunch,” Levi held up the bag nervously. “It’s from Ricci’s—your favorite.”

Erwin eyed the bag for a moment before holding out his hand, “Thank you, dear. That’s very kind of you.”

Dear… Levi could’ve sighed just from hearing that name again. It’d been so long since he’d had a pet name (outside of sex, of course)… I must be doing something right. He smiled and walked over to Erwin’s desk, handing him the paper bag.

“I have quite a bit of work to get done,” Erwin explained. “But I’ll see you at home, Levi.”

Levi nodded, knowing Erwin was a busy man. But he wondered how Erwin could get anything done with Marie sitting on his desk laughing with him over god knows what. He decided it was best not to dwell on that for now.

“Marie,” Erwin placed his hand on the woman’s forearm. “Will you show Levi out for me?”

Levi stared at the place where their skin touched, and watched Marie’s cheeks light up in a blush. He couldn’t hide the frown on his face. What was Erwin doing touching Marie like that when he was a happily married man? Well… perhaps not happily…

Marie nodded, hopping off the desk and taking Levi’s arm into hers as though they were best friends. She led him out of Erwin’s office and into the hall before the cheerful look on her face turned to a more deadly one.

“Perhaps you should lay off the Ricci’s,” Marie snarled through her teeth with a threatening grin before poking his stomach. “Maybe then your husband would love you.”

“W… What?” Levi breathed in shock.

Before the words had even left his mouth, she walked back into Erwin’s office and shut the door behind her, and the giggling Levi had heard before he walked in resumed. He felt as though Marie had just ripped a knife through him and his intestines were spilling out. He was absolutely gutted by the comment, and looked down at his stomach. Was this really the reason Erwin didn’t love him anymore?

Maybe then your husband would love you… Levi could feel the tears welling up in his eyes as he stormed out of the office and to the car. He wiped them on the back of his sleeve and asked the chauffeur to drive him back home, not wanting the driver to notice that anything was wrong.

Levi could barely keep himself together on the ride home. His breath was coming out in short little things as he tried to hold tears back. Anxiety built in his stomach and chest.

The driver must’ve seen the horrible state Levi was in. He pulled up to the front of the house and eyed Levi through the rear view mirror. Levi sniffled and wiped away more tears, feeling stupid and self-conscious.

“Sir,” the chauffeur murmured, taking out his handkerchief and handing it back to Levi, who took it gratefully, though still thoroughly embarrassed at being caught in this state. “Is there anything I can do for you?”

Levi shook his head, forcing a smile through the tears as he lied, “I… I’m fine, thanks.”

He wiped his eyes and handed the handkerchief back to the driver, who quickly apologized, “I’m sorry if I’ve overstepped, sir.”

“No no,” Levi insisted. “I appreciate it, I just… I need to have a lie down I think. I’m probably just tired.”

The driver nodded and got out, opening Levi’s door and helping him out of the car. Levi thanked him once more before heading inside and dismissing the maids and servants for the afternoon. He wanted to be alone.

Levi immediately went to the bedroom and ruffled through his drawers, pulling out the little tin he kept his cocaine and razor in. He lined it up on the dresser and snorted some, tears streaming down his face.

Why doesn’t he love me?